bullyfanonfandomcom-20200214-history
Talk:Greg Winston/@comment-1824274-20150902163914/@comment-1824274-20150903190450
Okay, so here's the way I see it. Now be prepared, this might take a while haha. So the first thing that bothered me right off the bat was that he's the son of Niko Bellic. I mean, it's just kind of, frankly, dumb. Having him being trained to fly helicopters and shoot guns and get in fights with the Yakuza and Mafia and shit? And he's only a teenager? That makes for a pretty unrealistic and really absurd storyline if you ask me. I'll get more into it as I go along. By having Greg do these crazy over-the-top things in your story, you are basically running in the complete opposite direction of what made Bully such an amazing game. The thing that was so great about it is that it was like Grand Theft Auto, but in a kid-friendly environment. By adding all these GTA-like elements to your story, you are making it more of a GTA fanfiction, and not a Bully fanfiction. Instead of rocket launchers you had the spud gun or bottle rocket launcher. Instead of having a pistol, you had the slingshot. By having Greg professionally trained in flying helicopters, stealing military hardware and vehicles, getting into crazy gang wars with REAL criminals and not kids, it just makes me feel like I'm reading a rehashed version of a scrapped Grand Theft Auto game. Greg Bellic is what you would classify as a Marty Sue. A Marty Sue is a character that is handsome, smart, always winning every fight, always getting away with shit with little to no consequences (whether they be external or internal consequences), etc. Marty Sue's are not fun to read about because it's not always fun to read about someone who's perfect or an absolute badass and nothing stands in his way. People like to read about characters that they can RELATE to. I don't think many people can relate to stealing helicopters and military property many times and getting away with it scott free. There needs to be CONFLICT in this story. When I read chapters about him, I feel like I'm reading about some guy who is on the longest winning streak of all time for anything, which isn't fun to read about. Now don't worry, I'll help you salvage his character and his story. If you really want to stay true to the world that Bully created, then the car chases, the guns, the gang wars, the stealing of military vehicles and helicopters, the out-of-place Niko Bellic crossover (speaking of which, didn't Bully take place in 2006 and GTA IV take place in 2008, making it impossible for Greg to interact with people who go to Bullworth during the events of Bully since he wasn't even born yet?) has got to go. You can take a moment to read through my comment to let you think about it and if you truly want me to help you, then let me know and I can continue on how to improve your character.